The Boilermaker carnage report

Ok, so there isn't much carnage to report, to be honest. I didn't run as fast as I would have liked, but for 9.3 miles in thick humidity, I think I did OK. I would give you my actual time, the accurate one measured by the chip I was wearing, but I can't. Why, you asked? Oh, because the timing company, the one hired to get all of our times correct...yeah, they dropped the ball BIG time. Apparently there was a malfunction at the start and all the data was lost. So, the only times we got were from the gun start. That is fine and dandy for a small 5k race, but when a start looks like this, you are going to have some explaining to do.
Not to mention that the race finishes on the grounds of the Saranac brewery, so some folks are going to be even more irate due to the all-you-can-drink fest.

Ah, nothing says dehydration better than a 9-mile run on a hot and humid day followed up by a dozen Saranac Pale Ales. Now enjoy that drive home, folks!

As for myself, I didn't partake in the hopps and barely love fest, as I already dry heaved enough for the day. I stuck to the free Vitamin water and snow cones...and try to take all the horrific outfits in. Seriously, what better way to say "LOOK AT ME" other than wearing a thin layer of microfiber in places where there should be a lot more material. Ah, but that is the distance runner for you. They are the same bunch that, while resting in the comforts of home...or at Disney Land, will not be afraid to be caught looking like so:

Yeah, that is the dreaded socks and sandals combination. I mean, there hasn't been a combination that deadly since I rocked Chun-Li on the Sega Genesis. There is nothi....

What? What about Blanka? Please. Blanka was trash. Ryu, maybe, but not Blanka; get out of here with that annoying body spin.

Anyway, how great is that socks and sandals specimen on the left? I know, I don't even think that the owner of these size 10's knows that he probably has killed a few people. Out for a slow nance around the park, Vern remains unaware that his devastating combo has caused many onlookers to go blind, even drawn the stare of those behind the wheel, causing massive road carnage.

Poor Vern, he just wanted to go for a little nance. Should have thought that one through, Vern. Should have thought that one through...

Overall, it was a fun weekend, even if I only got 1.3 minutes of sleep at the lovely Davis Motel. With two rooms the size of a freshman dorm and 15 people, not a lot of Z's were caught. Also, I would like to meet the artistic master that is in charge of landscaping at the DM; the fake floral arrangements throughout the property are breathtaking.

I must give props to my boy Mike Howard, who powered to a sub 60-minute finish after fighting Ebola throughout the previous week. Well done, bud. Also to John French, who sprinted for 9 miles and ran 49 minutes and change. Fast, very. I also want to give a huge cyber high-five to the folks who thought they were going to pull off a Guinness Book of World Records feat by handing out glasses with plastic noses on them. Apparently they forgot that they were also handing out free beer...to 15,000 REALLY thirsty people. Apparently everyone was supposed to put them on at a certain time. Whoops. This is what happened instead...

Ah, a good time had by all. And check it out, the debut race for the Petit Family Foundation jersey. Thanks to Dr. Petit for the logo of his family's charity. I certainly wore it with pride and will continue to do so for a long time. I will be running in the first annual Petit Family 5K this Sunday, July 20th in Plainville, CT. If anyone is interested, head on over to:

www.petitroadrace.com

and sign up.

Peace-

B